indestructible procaryote

I can't quite believe you are not here any more
You're the person I wake up with,
You're the sound I listen to,
You're the sun that enrich my life.

But off you go,
I don't see you around.

Are you mad at us not pulling you back?
But you seem happy
going to somewhere that you really want
I should but I can't be happy for you
Because listening to your saying your decision
is so painful.
My throught was like Australia, so dry, and burning deep inside.
Because I know i'll be missing you
Missing you so bad, that I'm gonna write a lot of words instead of crying.

We're big girls, remember?
So we don't cry.

But now I'm sitting here,
waiting my inspiration to come to knock me out of the silence of essay deadline at 5pm,
I can't hlep shouting in my heart, that I am sad. Very unhappy.

Who's gonna eat that box of Nutrigrain and leave the milk in the morning?
Who's gonna keep the light on for me when I get back home?
Who's gonna say 'let's not cook tonight' and go down and buy chicken pack from the indian korean place?Who's gonna go shower with me together after dinner?
Who's gonna fight with me before sleep

I know you do this for me as well...
An empty room really sorts out a lot of problems.
But I've never thought of you leaving this way.
Not this early!
Not so sudden!
Not like this!

I miss you already.
But I'm gonna try to change this sorrow into power
Because we have so much love to give, to share, to enjoy the life with
So there's no time to look back and sigh all the time
We'll look forward and fight for ourselves independently, but spiritually together.

I really wish I can take care of you longer.(Or the other way around?haha...)
Be safe there too.
This is no good bye, I know,
But really, take good care.
And here's still your home. 

Yup although nothing was done over the break, I'm back!!!!

Walter and I get two songs done in two nights...! Just like that, roughly but happily!

 

Special thanks to everyone who's been supporting us!

It's really, really important that you guys keep critisizing and commenting!!!

 

So, some hint on finding our works on youtube:

 

1. Search for Jo-Fan or tombapple(that's my account name)

2. you should fine about three videos post by me

3. Go to my page on youtube

4. click on my only "friend", his acc is betterman08

5. then you can see some of our clips that he post=)

 

We're trying to working on synchronizing our uploads. Apparently neither of us want to step back and compromise on using just one account....hahaha! But yeh, just try to be patient for this point of time!!

 

So new song:

Katrina_David Tao's Cover

 

The other one is "twenty two' by David Tao again, hopefully get uploaded by tonight!!

 

Ok....These are definitely longer! almost the whole song :D

And,

this time it's posted by ME!!

 

Special Thanks to Huate! This can't happen if it ain't for you! You're THE HERO!!

And thanks to Stephanie, my dearest roomate too! Always been so supportive and ... sleepy? haha~~love!

 

Song list:

 

Ta de jie mao她的睫毛(Cover) by Jay Chou周杰倫

 

Rainbow connection (Cover)

 

Officially missing you (Cover) by Tamia

This is the first clip we put on youtube yesterday~

Friends, or just acquaintances,

Just speak up....!!!!haha__no crtics, no improvement lor!

 

Follow the link:

 

I'm ready!!

21st birthday!!! Not a western traditional fan, so it initially didn't mean something too big for me. However, the time was too good to be waste for a 'end-of-the-semester' celebration. Plus it's the best time to get wild while we still have time to prepare for final exam. Therefore, there was this party.

 

I had 3 cakes this year...! So sweet! Floormates, after Stephanie wrote them little notes about the secret celebration at midnight, bought me 2 cakes and prepared a big big big birthday card! I was almost crying really! haha~It's like the most familiar people involving ever! And people were so kind too.....First year to be an SR, I felt like there is something growing in me. It's the feeling of responsibility and friendlyness..!

 

Saturday came the craziest day. Monica and Andy threw me a BBQ at Black Mountain Peninsula, Fantasic weather and food! Stephanie was too hungry to wait so she made a sausage sanwich. Being left on the table, it was unfortunately attacked by the birds......man!

 

Later that day, Qi, Leon, Sammy and Joanne all came to have steampot together. I was totally still full from the late lunch (plus breakfast!), so we went for basketball!! It was great! Basketball is something I think I'll hold on for a life time. Regardless how people say it's not a sports for girls, nor it's not suitable as I get old. I don't care, I love basketball!!!

 

Then people showered and opened up the gift for me! I got a big bean bag from Sammy, a doggy bean bag! So nice! I realized he's more considerate than I thought he is when he smiled and say I don't have to sit on the floor anymore when using my laptop. Touched! Leon and Joanne gave me a new set of speaker! White! So cool! and the volume control is like a big buttom!! coooool!

 

Qi is the best....!I had to do several waving toward my eyes to prevent the tear from falling off! She made a gift box containing 21 little things she made or bought, like a princess treasure box! I got her hand-made scarf, some earings, necklace, decoration, fruit (lol~) and love letter...!Man I feel a huge pressure. Her birthday is June15!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Steph remembered when we walked to Canberra centre downstairs I pointed at one teddy bear and shouted 'it's so cute!' Yea....Steph Thank you! I haven't got a normal size teddy bear since I came to Canberra! Now I finally have a teddy to hug, to listen to me, and to never betray me....*

 

Dinner was late. But we ate like monkeys.It's really good!!! Attention focused on the home-made green tea ice cream by Walter! I guess he was about to surprise me ba? haha_but the night before we happened to be together and he showed me the whole processs!! I was amazed at the simpleness of delicious dessert!

 

Can friendship be just pure and simple as well? Can the two be just professionally friendly and warm to each other forever? I wish. It is really what I wish for when I blew off my bday candle. To have great, proper relationship to each person I care and I like here in Canberra. It's really a city too peaceful to fight about anything. Street light grow from sunset, and everybody's face is clearer and clearer.

 

killer, detector, Never-ever. No matter what game we've played, we were in a game together, my friends. And that's the whole meaning about gathering. There was something happened that we aren't really happy about. It's ok. 'coz we witness the growth and path that you have been through. And we understand.

 

The reason for your leaving, the reason for you to cry, the reason for you to angry, the reason for you to be upset. You don't have to struggle to look for it any more baby. Because we'll find it for you. Or, there doesn't really need a excuse in front of us. We listen because we cre and we love you. You don't need no mask on the face and breathe barely.

 

Why am I writing this kinda long blog....?man I hate long blog myself......

 

But words have not come to an end, not even close. Steph keeps reminding me, what do I want him to be in my life. Yeah girl, that's the question I have to keep asking myself, about everybody, yes not only him, but about all people that's related to my life. Because we don't just bond with each other natually. Someone has to take the lead. You know, to orient the direction and speed of the relationship. And i think the most valuable thing about growing up is we're more familiar with this kinda controlling, and we see more clearly too, when someone wants to speed up or slow down, no matter what the intension was.

 

I wanna shout. Yes I wanna shout to you. Not as piss off or somthing, but I need a hole in the air to breath. Because I bubbled things up too much. I bubbled that you liked me too but you don't. I was a bit sad and cried a lil bit, but it's ok now. coz I'm repositioning you in my heart. Now you stay in a safe place, where my heart says 'you gotta be professional!'

 

There's someone better out there waiting for me. I tell myself. Just wait and grow. I'll make myself a better person. And maybe when the time comes, you'll regret not hold me tight but I'll have fly away. I'll be missing you, thank you, and be proud of myself not get sucked into the feeling that you seemed like me too. Because it's not true. You only see me as friend. And I see you as friend too now.

 

ar.....longer blog entry....what am I doing. Shoulders so sored!!! I need massage....

 

Thinking about you used to do massage for me, I'm surprised I don't feel sad no more. Now I think of the good you've done to me, I don't feel nothing but lucky. That God put me in front of you so we had loved.

 

Everyday was clear and true

Nothing had impacted on my soul or break my faith

because I have believed in truth, love, and bravery

 

People seemed to be the mildest in the zoo

Never fight with'em for the toilet priority,

not gossiped each other's ugly tail.

It's all like a peaceful melody

 

But you,

you make the morning noisy

when sunshine slides through the curtin

Your words and moves and laughters

linger like ghost

Haunted my at 8am.

 

Worse thing to know,

is that you knew you would have done this to me

can't help thinking about the warmth of what you sounds like

and the length of the stares between us

It's like time was frozen and the air stops moving

....Mummy also told me I have beautiful eyes.

 

Ev'day was good

I had nothing to expect or commit,

and nothing to lose

 

Until you bumped into my life that day

ev'thing changed,

I started to stressed when you don't come sharing with me a cup of hot chocolate,

Daytime seems getting longer when you're busy and cannot come just chill with me,

Dreams is getting a little bit too imaginative and I'm getting shy to talk about my emotion with my girls

It's getting very very sticky, your image in me.

 

But I somehow like it this way.

The way you've make me happy and smile like a child.

I somehow like it this way,

The way I miss you without pressure or out of duty because we're not there yet

I somehow like it this way,

The way you surprise me with unchained melody swinging everywhere I go...

 

________________________________________________________________________________

JoFan O.S.

This is my pure entertaining words. Playing wit words:) No direct reflection on anybody. Yeah you. Not you.^_^"

Random words,

Leaking hours,

Your stare breaks through all my defences

against the finest potential hurt that one could do to me.

 

Magically, you are everywhere to me one day

Since then, my life is full of happiness,

because I realized the beauty of loving someone,

is actually as graceful as being loved.

 

I'm no beautiful girl,

So all I'm wishing is make us the happiest

while we are still in each other's stares.

 

Someone told me once,

that one should always just satisfy the need,

but never the greed.

I'm no greedy girl.

All I wanna do is to sing to u...